My Second Love


I'm so thankful to the LORD for providing me with my second love -- my darling husband!


After listening to many women throughout my life, hearing from many of you here and also from the precious sisters from My Second Love: A Proverbs 31 Study Bible study, I have come to realize how very rare my husband is. And I don't mean compared to men of this world, as I don't compare my husband to any of them. For what does light have to do with darkness (2 Corinthians 6:15, Galatians 6:4)? But really, I don't compare my husband with anyone else's either, as this too, is not pleasing in the sight of the Lord . I do, however, compare my husband with what God's word says about a husband and what he ought to be like:

"Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave Himself up for her, that He might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, so that He might present the church to Himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish."
~ Ephesians 5:25-27

My husband is a God-revering, God-pleasing, single-hearted and minded man who rebukes and reproves me regularly because he loves Jesus more than he loves me. My Honey Pie is passionate about diligently cleansing me with the word of God so that I might not be ashamed before the sight of our Master and Lord (2 Timothy 2:15, 1 John 2:28).


Why is my husband so faithful about "cleansing" me with the Word of God? The answer is simple: not only is he my second love, but I am his second love too. And I am so proud to be such to him! I'm so proud to be a wife of a man who loves Jesus more than me. I'm so proud to be a wife who has a husband who prefers God's desires and His pleasure over my own! I'm so proud to be the wife of a man who doesn't allow my unstable emotions to alter His sight on Christ Jesus alone. I am proud to be a wife of a man who is not afraid to tell me God's truth, with great love and tenderness; always remembering that I am truly the weaker vessel (1 Peter 3:7) -- prone to be easily deceived by Satan, the world and even my own feelings and thoughts that are not in line with Scripture. With great wisdom, humility and fervor for the LORD, my darling is faithful to regularly spur me on toward love and good deeds; not for his gain, but for my good.

And how does my Honey Pie do all this? By trusting in the love and power of our Savior rather than trusting in me to provide him happiness, wholeness or acceptance. And this is important because I am not always in my right mind and I do not always feel so thankful that he rebukes or reproves me. Sometimes I lash out at him, sometimes I ignore him and sometimes I tell him that he is being unkind, insensitive and is hurting my feelings. But because my darling is wise and his source of strength and truth is in Christ and not me, he is able to withstand my attacks and attempts to stay in my sin until I feel like crawling out of the pit I'm wallowing in at the time.

What an incredibly blessed woman I am! To have a husband who is more concerned about my holiness rather than my temporal happiness! What an incredibly blessed woman I am to have a husband who has been given the great gift from God that usually only single men get -- an undivided heart, abandoned to Christ alone!

"I want you to be free from anxieties. The unmarried man is anxious about the things of the Lord, how to please the Lord. But the married man is anxious about worldly things, how to please his wife, and his interests are divided."
~ 1 Corinthians 7:32-34a

So what am I going to do with my thankful heart today? I've already thanked God (and will continue to) for making my husband the way he is. I'm also determined to stay in fervent prayer about receiving my husband's words of wisdom (his rebuke and reproof) from the Lord as a gift; because that's what it truly is...a gift from God. I am also resolved to not only thank God, but also my husband for not being afraid to give me what is good according to what God says is good and not what I say is good.

Wives:
Do you have a husband like this? If so, will you join me in giving much thanks to God for such godly men and resolve to bless him and not burden him?

If you don't have a husband like this because he is either an unbeliever or is a believer, but is afraid to lead you because you are such an unsubmissive, nagging, over-bearing, loud wife who is always much more quick to air her own opinions rather than quietly and reverently listen to her husband; will you repent and pray for God to help you live out 1 Peter 3:1-6?

Husbands:
If you are not leading your wife this way because you desire her approval and acceptance of you more than you desire God's, will you repent of this sin of idolatry, apologize to your wife and commit to God and her that you will, from this day forward, be more concerned about God's pleasure rather than your wife's -- with an undivided heart?

Will you commit this day, to love your wives enough to rightly and biblically judge her actions in accordance with Scripture (1 Corinthians 5:12) and not lord your authority over her, but correct her when she is in sin,  and exhort her to live abandoned to Christ alone, die to self and abide only in Jesus?

I'm praying for and thanking God for all of you. I pray that the Lord will bless you and spur all of you on toward love and good deeds, just as He has me.

7 comments