Scripture art by: Biblescreen.com

The LORD God Almighty, Creator of the heavens and the earth—is personal. He could've left us to our sinful natures, miserable, lost and debased. But He didn't. He could've chosen to save us from afar in an impersonal way by zapping us with a lightening rod from the heavens. But He didn't. He could've done so many things us human beings would consider, or even actually do. So let us thank God; that He didn't.

Because God is holy (set apart), He did what only He can do and what He alone is willing to do with no external prodding (as if anyone could "prod" God to do anything). He chose to create, in His own image; human beings. Unlike any other creation, people alone, are His image-bearers. We alone have the ability to reason, to consider things, understand cause and effect, acknowledge our own existence (i.e., animals look in the mirror and think it's another animal, people know it's their own reflection). As God's image-bearers, He has given us emotions, a desire for truth and intimate relationships. He's given every human being a conscience whereby we distinguish between good and evil.

But too often in any religion, whether false religion (i.e., Self, Mormonism, Hinduism, Buddhism, etc.) or true religion (Christianity), we're all prone to the sin of wanting to appear as if we have it all together. We're all proud and boastful, whether overtly or covertly. The only truly humble person who's walked this earth is Jesus Christ the Lord. And only those who abide in Him through faith in His perfectly finished work of salvation can walk as He walked, and only by the power of His Holy Spirit.

Therefore, Jesus alone can rightly act as if He has it all together, because He's the only one that really does. His actions aren't merely premeditated drama to make us think He's a certain way. Jesus' actions are real and true so that we can know with certainty that He is that way. Every way He presents Himself is who He really is. There is no pretense with Christ and there should be none with the those who profess His name.

Rather than deal with us from afar, rather than rescue us in an impersonal and anonymous, unknowable manner, God came in the flesh—in the Person of Jesus Christ, the only Savior for all mankind. God the Father touched all humanity through His Son's physical body. His Son touched our lives by living as one of us, feeling what we felt, struggling as we struggled and living as we live, but was without sin. His Holy Spirit touches our souls by indwelling the spirits of those who repent and trust in the only Son of God. Yet, we refuse to be personal and often shrink back from touching others. Oh, I don't mean the acquaintance like hugs and salutations we exchange. I mean the real life touches that binds hearts and lives. These "touches" aren't always physical, but they always warm and penetrate the soul.

We don't "touch" others, because we're afraid they may have "warts" we don't want to see or deal with. We don't want them to get too close and touch us either, because they may see beyond our plastic and refined religious exterior, and gasp at our warts. Just like we would judgmentally gasp at theirs.

"The truths of God are never meant to be distant theories we abstractly ponder in our ivory towers, but rather truths that find us in real-life pits of despair and dark alleyways and lead us home again. May we never settle for simply 'knowing' that God is strong, but may His strength find us in our weakness."

~The Verses Project, on Psalm 118:13-14

God made Himself known to us in an extraordinary manner—God becoming an ordinary man, so that as His image-bearers, we might make our ordinary selves known to others so that they might see the work of our extraordinary God in us. You see, only when we are willing to be real, only when we are willing to boast (that is, speaking at length) about our weaknesses (2 Cor 12:9-10) can anyone see how extraordinary, how awesome, and unlike us, our Lord truly is. It's difficult to distinguish or grasp the true beauty of a treasure if it's surrounded by fake polished gold. But it's not difficult for anyone to see treasure in the midst of a dunghill.

God is real. God is personal. And as His beloved children, we ought to be too.

"And His mercy is for those who fear Him from generation to generation. He has shown strength with His arm; He has scattered the proud in the thoughts of their hearts; He has brought down the mighty from their thrones and exalted those of humble estate; He has filled the hungry with good things, and the rich He has sent away empty."

~Luke 1:50-53

What does it mean, to give thanks in all circumstances?

In First Thessalonians chapter five, the Apostle Paul closes with a list of things that every Christian ought to do (vv. 12-22), but can't do in our own strength or by our own sheer will. Perhaps we can accomplish some, or all that's on this list, but it would only be a temporary appearance of godly character rather than a faithful and continual walk. For we know if we do not abide in Christ, we will not bear His fruit. And any true godly quality we exhibit is a demonstration of the power of the Holy Spirit within us (1 Cor 2:5), not from our flesh that continually desires the ways of this world.

I often refer to my physical trials as a gift from the Lord and something He has seen fit to work in my life for my greatest benefit. And often, I get questions and comments from people who are outraged by my proclamation that a good and loving God would bring pain into my life. They tell me I'm rather foolish and audacious to claim God would do anything besides make me healthy, wealthy and happy. But that's not what God says.

"For the Lord will not cast off forever, but, though He cause grief, He will have compassion according to the abundance of His steadfast love; for He does not willingly afflict or grieve the children of men."

~Lamentations 3:31-33 (ESV)

In Psalm 119 verses 67 and 71, the psalmist sees the good purposes of afflictions in this life: they keep us from going astray and give us deeper understanding and appreciation for God's holy statutes. The writer of Hebrews also echos this in chapter 12 when he talks about God's loving and faithful discipline, which is painful at the time, but for those who endure and are trained by it, they will yield the peaceful fruit of righteousness.

"Therefore, since we have been justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ. Through Him we have also obtained access by faith into this grace in which we stand, and we rejoice in hope of the glory of God. More than that, we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, and hope does not put us to shame, because God's love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us."

~Romans 5:1-5 (ESV)

Wow! Who doesn't want to build endurance, character and hope? Everyone, both believers and non-believers aspire to such a high and noble stature, but this can only be obtained by divine providence; by the power of God's Holy Spirit that indwells the children of the Most High God.

I would be lying if I didn't admit the hardships of these 10 years, with the past five encumbered by many hospital admits, five surgeries, countless procedures and tests, and the acquisition of more specialists than there are colors in the rainbow. Constant physical pain, and I mean pain on the scale from 5 - 10 on good days, every day, non-stop (up until recently) has really worn on me. It was always something, one thing after another. I was either tearing a muscle, a tendon, or an organ wasn't working right or my blood work was out of whack...again. It was a constant dance for my doctors to try to figure out what would help me without causing something else in my highly precarious system to malfunction.

And I'm supposed to be grateful for this? Yes!

"So we do not lose heart. Though our outer self is wasting away, our inner self is being renewed day by day. For this light and momentary affliction is preparing for us an eternal weight of glory beyond all comparison, as we look not to the things that are seen but to the things that are unseen. For the things that are seen are transient, but the thing that are unseen are eternal."

~2 Corinthians 4:16-18 (ESV)

Did you hear that? Did you hear what our heavenly Father said here? He said that He makes even the most agonizing and grievous things in this life work for our benefit! So then, if God uses even the "bad" experiences to work for our greater good, then the question is, why is suffering a bad thing if it's working good in us and for us—for this life and the one to come?

If this doesn't give you reason to be grateful for whatever you may be suffering today, consider Hebrews 5:7-8, "In the days of His flesh, Jesus offered up prayers and supplications, with loud cries and tears, to Him who was able to save Him from death, and He was heard because of His reverence. Although He was a son, He learned obedience through what He suffered." We are not greater than Jesus (Lk 6:40), so if He "learned obedience through what He suffered" how much more will we learn? Besides that, let's do a reality check here. Jesus didn't deserve one iota of suffering, but we deserve more suffering than we will ever know because God poured out His wrath on His Son instead of us.

In view of this awesome mercy and grace from God, we should rejoice in the freedom of our salvation and give thanks to God in all and for all circumstances. Our circumstances don't determine our joy; Jesus does, and He's already sealed it by giving us His Holy Spirit.

"Peace I leave with you; My peace I give to you. Not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your hearts be troubled, neither let them be afraid...I have said these things to you, that in Me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation. But take heart, I have overcome the world."

~John 14:27, 16:33 (ESV)

P.S. I almost forgot. For those who've been praying and have asked about my heart issues; the meds are working and I'm doing well. Thank you for your prayers and thank you for asking! ♥

I look to the Lord.

"Hear my cry, O God, listen to my prayer; from the end of the earth I call to You when my heart is faint. Lead me to the rock that is higher than I, for You have been my refuge, a strong tower against the enemy." (Psalm 61:1-3, ESV) In my current situation, my "enemy" just happens to be my own body.

My literal heart is faint. As many of you know, the Lord has allowed, in accordance with His good and perfect will, for my body to suffer many things these past 10 years. Now with five surgeries within five years (I didn't write about my kidney stone surgery and stent last year...I just didn't feel like it, sorry), I have another issue that requires extensive medical attention. I have a heart arrhythmia.

I have what's called premature ventricular contractions (PVCs). I've actually had them for the past five years, with about one year where they completely went away. They started up again this past year, but similar to when they started, they were benign, as most PVCs are. But because God has blessed me with extremely wise and kind doctors, my cardiologist did a full workup (stress echo, blood work and 24-hour Holter monitor). All tests looked good and the 24-hour Holter monitor only showed 13 PVCs occurring in one day. I didn't have any symptoms either. They were just annoying.

About four weeks ago my PVCs began behaving a bit differently. Rather than come and go, they came and stayed. They came all day, every day with increased frequency from every other heart beat (bigeminy) to every three heart beats (trigeminy). I began to have symptoms (which I never had before): lightheadedness, breathlessness, and near fainting. My blood pressure began to drop, especially with exercise and my resting pulse danced around the high 50s and low 60s.

By God's providence my yearly physical with my PCP was scheduled a week after these constant PVCs began and she ran an EKG. It didn't look good, so she sent it to my cardiologist who saw me in his office the next day. They agreed I needed to start a beta-blocker (Metoprolol XL succinate). We tried it for a week, but it wasn't working, and my blood pressure (96/57) and pulse rates (fluctuated from the mid 30s to high 50s) were too low. So they told me to stop taking the Metoprolol and come in to get hooked up to a 24-hour Holter monitor so they could compare it to last year's.

Did I have a pity party in the midst of all this? Yes, I most certainly did. Did I get a bit depressed, a little angry and exacerbated that these PVCs couldn't just be like all the other ones I've had for the past five years? Yes I did. Did I overstay my welcome at my pity party? By the grace of God, no, I didn't.

Those of us who've been given a new life in Christ have the freedom to choose—to look at ourselves or to look at the Almighty.

"I waited patiently for the LORD; He inclined to me and heard my cry. He drew me up from the pit of destruction, out of the miry bog, and set my feet upon a rock, making my steps secure. He put a new song in my mouth, a song of praise to our God. Many will see and fear and put their trust in the LORD."

~Psalm 40:1-3 (ESV)

I'm so very grateful the Lord lifted me out of the miry bog of self pity because yesterday, I wound up in the Cardiac ED and was kindly treated there for four hours. The Cardiac ED is quite nice and they take you in and begin treating you immediately rather than spending most of your time in the waiting room. I was hooked up right away to an EKG, had blood work and a chest x-ray done along with an IV put in place so they could slowly give me three doses of Metoprolol to get my PVCs under control.

The doctor at the Cardiac ED contacted my cardiologist's office and discovered that my 24-hour Holter monitor showed that I was having 24,386 PVCs in one day. Anything that's above 20,000 per day is too much. So as usual, it seems I have to be the overachiever (wink). They switched me from two Metoprolol succinate (24-hour extended release tablets) to two to three Metoprolol tartrate (12-hour tablets), hoping this will help reduce the amount of PVCs I'm having to decrease heart damage.

My wonderful nurse Andrea from my cardiologist's office has taken fantastic care of me with the other doctors in the practice since my cardiologist is out of the country for a couple of more weeks. The next steps are to get an echo (echocardiogram) to make sure my heart hasn't weakened, and a visit with an electrophysiologist (a cardiologist that specializes in the electrical functioning of the heart that causes arrhythmias).

Why am I sharing all this? I'm sharing this for two primary reasons:

"What shall I render to the LORD for all His benefits to me? I will lift up the cup of salvation and call on the name of the LORD, I will pay my vows to the LORD in the presence of all His people.

"Those who sow in tears shall reap with shouts of joy! He who goes out weeping, bearing the seed for sowing, shall come Home with shouts of joy, bringing His sheaves with him."

~Psalm 116:12-14, 126:5-6 (ESV)

May all who know the Lord Jesus, return to Him with a harvest of righteousness, sown by His love, in our hearts, extended to others (2 Cor 5:20, James 3:18).