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It can be, but not always. There's self-pity (which is a sin) that brings some to become depressed. There are times when we're wounded due to self-inflicted trauma (meaning, you've behaved in ungodly and immature ways and now you have to lie in the messy bed you've made [1 Peter 2:20, 3:9, 4:14-15]). And there are traumatic situations that occur in a person’s life that are totally out of their control which brings them to depression.

In order to find out whether or not it's a faith issue or a medical issue, you should visit with your Pastor and/or a wiser and older Christian as well as your physician to determine the cause (if possible) and the degree of your depression.

I've been depressed before in my life, mostly due to self-inflicted stress and trauma, mixed in with a large dose of self-pity. And this depression was a faith issue. How do I know? Well, because my eyes were focused on me and my life and how I thought everything should be. It’s clear I was involved in self-worship. Since I was in despair due to a sin issue, that’s what made my depression a faith issue rather than a medical one.

After my recent back surgery, I was put on heavy pain medications that I'd never been on before and for a longer time period than I’m accustomed to (two and a half months). I unknowingly got myself off of them too quickly and suffered from painful withdrawal symptoms; one of them being depression.

It's been nearly two weeks since I've completely been off of my pain medications and all the withdrawal symptoms have subsided to a manageable point...except the depression. After suffering from this depression for four weeks, I went to see my doctor.

Though it's still a bit humiliating to admit, I've been diagnosed as being clinically and severely depressed due to low serotonin and was put on Lexapro which is an SSRI (selective serotonin reuptake inhibitor); a type of anti-depression medication.

I've only been on it for a week now and it takes three to four weeks for it to build up in my body, so I'm not noticing any relief from my depression yet.

But you know, God has blessed me with the most wonderful family and friends. My darling husband has been amazingly supportive, tender, understanding and proactive in helping me determine exactly what activities I "need" to do and not do. And in treating me so tenderly, through his actions, our sons have learned the same. My friends have lovingly and faithfully kept me in their prayers. They’ve come to visit me, brought me gifts that lift my soul, encourage me and do things that help relieve the heavy burden I perpetually feel.

Though I’m easily overwhelmed by most things, I’m grateful to God for His word, my family and friends that brings me so much joy and peace, even in the midst of my present darkness.

Twenty years ago today, the Lord chose to unite me and my beloved husband together in holy matrimony.

We were both young, naive about marriage and still a bit prideful and self-serving. Naturally our pride deceived us into believing otherwise.

The first several years of our marriage were rocky as we both tried to mold one another into our own image of what we thought a husband/wife looked like.

With one child, and conversations about divorce, we were nearly done. But God's plans are never thwarted.

Never.

The Lord decided that we would be married until death do us part and have two sons with whom He would also use for His glory. As we've learned, our marriage isn't about the two of us—it's about Christ.

Out of God's great mercy and compassion for the young fools we were, He granted us the wisdom we finally asked for and committed to love one another always second to Christ. We took divorce off the table and resolved to keep Christ as our First Love; to serve Him, to bring Him glory and please Him in every way with our marriage.

No longer seeing marriage as a way to feel "complete" or satisfy any self-fulfilling desires, we pressed on to love one another not because to make each other happy, but because God created our marriage to make us holy and conform us more and more into the image of Christ.

We've had many trials in our marriage. Trials with extended family. Trials with friends. Trials with our kids. And through it all, God made our marriage stronger and more firmer in Christ. With every wind of adversity, we hunkered down together to find our identity, our purpose, our lives, hid in Christ alone.

I strive to the be biblical, Proverbs 31 woman first to please my Lord, second to serve and honor my husband. My husband strives to live up to all that is written in God's word of what a man after His own heart looks like (Eph 5:25-31); and he does this well.

Though I still have a long way to go, the Lord has given us both the peace and love we need to press on together as we long to deepen our relationship with Christ as "one"—living only to please, honor and glorify the Son of God.

We are here to make much of Jesus. Not of ourselves.

May the LORD receive all praise and glory for the 20 years He's generously granted us and for whatever more He chooses to give us. May the name of the Lord forever be praised. Amen.

"Gracious is the LORD, and righteous;
our God is merciful.
The LORD preserves the simple;
when I was brought low, He saved me.
Return, O my soul, to your rest;
for the LORD has dealt bountifully with you."
Psalm 116:5-7

As Christians, most of us know the well-rehearsed verse "Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds,..." (James 1:2). But most of us don't really understand what it means to consider our trials a joy—especially when the reality of it finally sets in and takes us down a road we never meant to travel...if we let it.

I'm nearly seven weeks out from my latest surgery; the worst and most painful experience I can remember. And now, at last, the reality of it all is finally beginning to set in: nights with interrupted sleep, the confinement of a brace, the weakness I notice when I don't have it on, the fatigue...oh, the fatigue. Yes, it's all starting to become very old and very real, making the "joy" in this trial appear as if it's impossible to grasp. But God promises everything is not as they appear (2 Cor 4:16-18). So I look to Him and not to that which I can only see.

"I lift up my eyes to the hills.
From where does my help come?
My help comes from the LORD,
who made heaven and earth.
He will not let your foot be moved;
He who keeps you will not slumber.
Behold, He who keeps Israel
will neither slumber nor sleep.
The LORD is your keeper;
the LORD is your shade on your right hand.
The sun shall not strike you by day,
nor the moon by night.
The LORD will keep you from all evil;
He will keep your life.
The LORD will keep
your going out and your coming in
from this time forth and forevermore."
~PSALM 121

Refreshing. Comforting. Enlightening. I love God's word. Don't you?

Now, before I go on, let me make one thing clear lest anyone take this beautiful passage of Scripture and mutilate it with their own perverse thinking. God is most certainly not saying here that nothing "bad" (evil) will ever happen to you. No, read the rest of that sentence, "He will keep your life." Now that's quite a different thing than promising that all you days will be filled with nothing but happiness, health, wealth and ease. Far from it. It means so much more. The LORD of heaven and earth is promising that those who fear Him, have repented and trusted in the name of His one and only Son, will have their life hid and protected in Him and therefore will never be in danger or fear of the second death; which is eternal damnation in Hell; for their life is kept by God, with God and for God...alone.

Being a child of God means so much more than the false teachers of prosperity (i.e., Joyce Meyer, Joel Osteen, Creflo Dollar, etc.) preach today. God's word promises that our lives are kept by Him. We are eternally His; it just doesn't get any better than that. There is no degree of health or wealth that trumps this promise: my life is hid in Christ (Psalm 27:5).

So when the reality of this trial set in, I began to grow quite weary of this surgery that has a nine month recovery period, countless limitations, added measures to keep my back safe, extreme fatigue, the brace, struggling with a self-pitying bad attitude, and a tired and wearied not-so-"sunny" disposition. As a matter of fact, I believe there are days I could change my name to "mildly cloudy with a chance of showers, so don't provoke me" or "severe weather ahead, take cover and don't come near". But even still, in the midst of the reality of this trial and the weariness of it all, I am grateful that my life is hid in Christ; my life is kept by God Almighty, and in due time, He will lift me up from this place and I will be healed (whether it be on this side of Heaven or not, I do not know, nor do I care).

I know all I need to know: though the waves of reality come crashing down on me, once I cry out to my glorious Savior, He always, immediately reaches out His hand and lifts me up to where He is; on steady footing and in His presence so I can see things the way He does: with eternity in view (Matt 14:30-33; Is 43:1-2).

This is not my home. This body is not my permanent body. These limitations are temporary. And one day, I will have a new, perfect body; one without sin. One day, I will see my Lord in His full glory. One day, I will be free from every trouble in this world and live the rest of my days in Heaven, with my God, my Savior. One day, I will be able to worship Him as He is due (1 Chron 16:29), and I will be able to do this faithfully without the constant interruptions of this flesh of sin.

One day, I'll be Home.

"I waited patiently for the LORD; He inclined to me and heard my cry. He drew me up from the pit of destruction, out of the miry bog, and set my feet upon a rock, making my steps secure. He put a new song in my mouth, a song of praise to our God. Many will see and fear, and put their trust in the LORD."
~Psalm 40:1-3

This is my prayer.

If you're reading this today and you realize you don't have the same assurance I have, please contact me. I'd love to share the love of Christ with you.





I am blessed because God is God and remains on the throne regardless of what my circumstances are or how I might feel about them from time to time.

I am in pain. I am "confined". I am limited by and to many things. But I am not crushed by them nor do they cause me to despair. Are there times I whine a bit here and there or wish for the pain and limitations to dissipate? Yes. But they do not cause me to question my heavenly Father for allowing such things in my life. Why? Because I already know the answer: we live in a fallen and broken world, and while we're here, we must live in our fallen, broken and mortal bodies.

This is my latest Get Well gift "basket". I put "basket"
 in quotes because the basket was so large, it was on
wheels and as you can see, some of this gifts couldn't
even fit in the basket! My sweet and precious friend
Leanne Holiman gave these to me yesterday. ♥
I never ask, "Why me, Lord?" because why shouldn't it be me? Am I better than others that painful trials should come to them and not me? Absolutely not.

God is sovereign. God is good. God loves me. That means regardless of my circumstances, all should always be well with my soul because Jesus Christ is its Master and nothing can change that (John 10:27-29). Now, does this mean I slap on a silly smile on my face and pretend I'm not in pain or from time to time, feel frustration from these eight years of physical trials and chronic illnesses? No. What it means is, in spite of feeling frustrated and annoyed at times, my spirit is always lifted higher, to the Lord my God, to my Christ who knows physical pain far greater than I or any human being can or ever will. And because I know this truth, I know my Lord Jesus knows how to care for me and comfort me as I need and not as I want or think I need.


"For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but one who in every respect has been tempted as we are, yet without sin. Let us then with confidence draw near to the throne of grace, that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need."
~Hebrews 4:15-16

In my time of need, when I'm tempted to sin against my Lord by questioning Him and moaning, groaning and complaining about my circumstances, I remember my Lord's words, that I can draw near with confidence and ask God for help every time I am tempted not to trust my Savior.

Here I am using the wonderful robe and foot jet
massage spa from my sweet friend
Leanne Holiman.
I'm sharing all this with you today, because though I'm still in much pain and I have a long road of recovery ahead of me, I'm grateful and know I am blessed. Because God loves us so intimately and cares for us so specifically and remembers our weaknesses (Ps 103:13-14), He blesses us with all that we could never imagine to ask for and much more than we could ever deserve.

Since my hospital admit and surgery, God has poured out His love to me through my loving and thoughtful husband and sons; my incredibly kind, gracious and generous Daddy and Mommy; and through my amazingly kind and loving friends both in "real" life and online. I've received countless cards full of love, prayers and compassion for me. I've received gifts, flowers, candy, gift certificates, meals, and friends who are willing to pick me up and take me to lunch or breakfast. I've received two large and generous gift baskets, one from my husband's office and another from a sweet and precious friend.

When we go through difficult and painful trials in our lives, God always makes even the painful more pleasant through the love of those in the body of Christ and many others He chooses to use to bless, encourage and care for His children.

I am blessed beyond measure and grateful to the uttermost for my Savior and His love and provisions for me during my short sojourn here in this fallen and broken world; in my broken and temporal body. And I look forward to the day that my body will be redeemed and I will have my eternal, unbroken and perfect body when I see I see my Savior face to face in Heaven!


      "When I look at Your heavens, the work of Your fingers,
the moon and the stars, which You have set in place,
what is man that You are mindful of him,
and the son of man that You care for him?
Yet You have made him a little lower than the heavenly beings
and crowned him with glory and honor.
You have given him dominion over the works of Your hands;
You have put all things under his feet,
all sheep and oxen,
and also the beasts of the field,
the birds of the heavens, and the fish of the sea,
whatever passes along the paths of the seas.
O LORD, our Lord,
how majestic is Your name in all the earth!
~Psalm 8:3-9



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