abandoned to Christ.

One of the greatest blessings in a marriage is having children. And one of the most damaging aspects of a marriage are—having children.

How do you keep your marriage and parenting the blessings that God meant them to be? You do it by remembering these four things: why God created marriage and children, what purpose they serve, who they're for, and the priority they have.

God created both marriage and children to make you holy rather than provide you with temporal and sporadic periods of happiness. Marriage and children should always draw you to your knees in prayer and thanksgiving to God as you humbly ask for His wisdom and love so that you might deal rightly and kindly with your spouse and your children (Philippians 4:4-6).

All aspects of a Christian's life is contained in the greatest commandment, "love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength" and to "love your neighbor as yourself" (Mk 12:30-31). From this, we can clearly ascertain that everything, including marriage and children are for the glory and exaltation of Christ alone (Revelation 4:11), for without Him, we would have nothing good in this life or the next.

Many Christians will readily agree with the statements above for why God created marriage, the purpose they serve and who they're for. Usually, the problem arises when the desires of your child is lifted above the desires of your spouse.

"Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh."

~Genesis 2:24

God said He made you "one" with your spouse, not your children.

Our priorities in life must align with God's word. The Lord is clear He uses marriage as the earthly paradigm of Christ's relationship to His Bride, the Church (Eph 5:24-25). Which means you should never allow your children to come between you and your spouse.

The love, peace and oneness of marriage takes precedence over your children's desires, your desires for your children or over parenting disagreements you might have with your spouse.

Wives, submit to your husbands in everything as it is written in God's word. Husbands honor your wives as the weaker vessel so your prayers won't be hindered (1 Peter 3:7). And both of you should remember to keep God's divine order for your family, trusting that God will surely provide whatever is necessary for your child as you honor your spouse and his/her desires before you give to your child.

Don't cause the unbelieving world to malign God's word by allowing anything (including your children) to divide you and your spouse. Protect your marriage from anything or anyone who dares to separate what God has brought together.

Remember when we were little and there was always that older family member or teacher in our life that we could always trust to look out for our best interest...whether or not we wanted them to?

Remember how they always spoke the truth to you, with a loving smile, a gentle touch and strong words of wisdom that cut your heart if you were in sin, yet was exactly what you needed to carry you through a trial?

I'm grateful to my heavenly Father for all those adults who were used by God (whether they knew it or not) to make a frightened and often troubled little girl feel safe and loved. And as if that weren't more than I deserved, by God's grace and tender mercies, He provided me with the most magnificent husband who loves me better than anyone ever has because He loves me with God's perfect love that considers Christ first, rather than his personal desires, or even mine. I rest perfectly in that love.

"but let him who boasts boast in this, that he understands and knows Me, that I am the LORD who practices steadfast love, justice, and righteousness in the earth. For in these things I delight, declares the LORD.”

~Jeremiah 9:24

Many Christians lack much of God's peace that transcends understanding (Philippians 4:6-7). Like the rest of the world, we fret over painful circumstances and wallow in self-pity rather than stand firm like soldiers in Christ (Is 46:8-10; 1 Cor 16:13). We whine like infants in a playpen when something doesn't feel good and we moan constantly, demanding that someone give us quick and constant relief, as if we deserve it.

We all know that fear is the opposite of faith. And we know that fearing anything or anyone except God is sin when we allow our fear to determine how we react or respond to something or someone. If our fear influences our behavior, we're demonstrating we don't trust God and His unchanging character (Ps 78:21-22).

"The end of the matter; all has been heard. Fear God and keep his commandments, for this is the whole duty of man...'I tell you, My friends, do not fear those who kill the body, and after that have nothing more that they can do. But I will warn you whom to fear: fear Him who, after He has killed, has authority to cast into hell. Yes, I tell you, fear Him! Are not five sparrows sold for two pennies? And not one of them is forgotten before God. Why, even the hairs of your head are all numbered. Fear not; you are of more value than many sparrows.' "

~Ecclesiastes 12:13; Luke 12:4-7

So what's the cure for this manifestation of distrust and lack of faith in God? The cure comes like a soothing balm that envelopes the soul with inexplicable peace, while providing supernatural strength (2 Cor 12:10; 1 Pet 4:11) through all trials, for every child who remembers this foundational truth: He is the LORD, He is sovereign, He is good and He loves His children to the uttermost (John 13:1)...even to the point of relinquishing His glory to come to inhabit the earth in human form, to suffer and be crucified so that we who are guilty of the most heinous crime (sinning against a righteous God) might be reconciled to Him in love and holiness (Philippians 2:6-8).

"I will remember the deeds of the LORD; yes, I will remember Your wonders of old. I will ponder all Your work, and meditate on Your mighty deeds. Your way, O God, is holy. What god is great like our God? You are the God who works wonders; You have made known Your might among the peoples."

~Psalm 77:11-14

Mediate on the wondrous works of God to prevent from being swallowed up by thoughts of self-comfort or preservation.

Lack of trust results in lack of peace, but great trust, produces great peace and thanksgiving to the Lord.