"Charm is deceitful, and beauty is vain, but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised. Give her the fruit of hands, and let her works praise her in the gates...I have been crucified with Christ. It is no longer I who live, but Christ who lives in me. And the life I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God who loved me and gave Himself for me...Indeed, I count everything as loss because of the surpassing worth of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord. For His sake I have suffered the loss of all things and count them as rubbish, in order that I may gain Christ and be found in Him..."

~Proverbs 31:30-31, Galatians 2:20, Philippians 3:8-9 (ESV)

For the past month our oldest son has been asking me what I want for Mother's Day. I've had no other ideas to offer him except one: that he aspire nothing greater than to grow in the grace and knowledge of the Lord Jesus Christ; walk closely with Him and that love for the Almighty be preeminent in his life.

I'm 45 now and I pretty much have everything I need or want. When you get to be my age, there's very little you desire that money can buy. The things that are most cherished are the things of the heart. And since Christ is my Lord and Savior, His Holy Spirit inhabits my heart and directs my desires to be more like Christ and less like I was pre-second birth (Rom 8:28-29, Gal 2:20).

The desires of our flesh begin to wane as we draw nearer to the Lord Jesus. We begin to see things with the new spiritual eyes He gave us. And the things we treasure are no longer the things that satisfy our flesh. We begin only to long for the greater things—the things that satisfy the Spirit of Christ within us.

"What shall I render to the LORD for all His benefits to me? I will lift up the cup of salvation and call on the name of the LORD, I will pay my vows to the LORD in the presence of all His people."

~Psalm 116:12-14 (ESV)

This Mother's Day is bitter sweet for me as I only have one son still in my life. Our second son, as many of you have already read, is our prodigal and has disdained and rejected all that our most generous and gracious Lord has blessed him with through our family. Sadly, our son is a scoffer (Prov 9:7, 13:1) and prefers to join himself with people who tickle his ears (Prov 26:28, 27:6) rather than love him and build him up in the truth (Ps 141:5).

Because we have the love of Christ, we have much pity for our son gone astray and for those helping him in his rebellion. There is no safer or lovelier place than in the Lord Jesus, and they're all missing out on the greatest Gift.

May our merciful and compassionate LORD grant them all godly grief (2 Cor 7:9-10).

"It is only as Christ's words remain in us and we remain in him that we will be delivered from the rootless Christianity so characteristic of our times."

~Sinclair Ferguson (A Heart for God)

The greatest gift a mother's heart desires is not for gold, trinkets or anything that will fade away with this world. But the greatest desire any God-fearing and Christ-loving mother has, is to see her children, all her children, walking in truth (1 Jn 3:18). And this is something she can't do for them.

There's a point and time in every person's life where they need to take responsibility for the gifts and even sin patterns they have. Every saved person can choose to use their God-given strengths to overcome the sinful temptations of their flesh, or they can ignore the good and revel in the evil.

A mother can neither take the credit for the fruit and blessings of a godly child, nor can she take the blame for one gone astray. The best and most loving thing a mother can do is be obedient to God's Word (Deut 6:6-9, Prov 31:26) and diligently train up her children in the loving discipline and instruction of the LORD; and trust Him for the results.

My heart echoes what Job aptly spoke, "Naked I came from my mother's womb, and naked shall I return. The LORD gave, and the LORD has taken away; blessed be the name of the LORD." (Job 1:21, ESV).

"We turn to God when our foundations are shaking, only to learn that it is God who is shaking them."

~Charles West

Though this Mother's Day will be bitter sweet, it will be more sweet than bitter because Jesus is still on the throne and the Almighty is still sovereign. Therefore, I choose to relish the goodness of Christ my Savior and thank Him for both my sons, the one who strives for holiness and the one who has spurned God's goodness. All children are gifts from God (Ps 127:3); therefore, I am grateful and rejoice!

The first week of April 2014, my darling husband Jim shared something on Facebook that really peaked my interest. He posted the Bible study, Scripture memory and reading methods of A.W. Pink. After reading it, I was a bit hesitant, but printed it out and desired to do the same.

"In my early years I assiduously followed this threefold course:

"First, I read through the entire Bible three times a year (eight chapters in the Old Testament, and two in the New Testament daily.) I steadily persevered in this for ten years, in order to familiarize myself with its contents, which can only be done by consecutive reading.

"Second, I studied a portion of the Bible each week, concentrating for ten minutes (or more) each day on the same passage, pondering the order of it, the connection between each statement, seeking a definition of the important terms in it, looking up all the marginal references, being on the look-out for its typical significance. 

"Third, I meditated on one verse each day; writing it out on a slip of paper in the morning, memorizing it, consulting it at odd moments through the day; pondering separately each word in it, asking God to open for me its spiritual meaning and to write it on my heart. The verse was my food for that day, meditation standing to reading as mastication does to eating.

"The more some such method as the above be followed out, the more shall we be able to say, ‘thy word is a lamp unto my feet, and a light unto my path’ [Ps 119:105].”

~Arthur Pink, Letters of A.W. Pink

I was hesitant because I'm a slow reader and wasn't sure I could actually complete step one daily. I already do steps two and three, so that was no problem. But step one loomed over me. So I decided to test the waters and timed myself during my first initial readings before I committed myself to this seemingly arduous task.

To my surprise, I discovered it only took me anywhere from 30-45 minutes to read 10 chapters of Scripture per day. I was ashamed because as I considered the short time span, instantly my mind went to all the old movies I like to watch (approximately two hours long), the collective time I spend on social media throughout the day, the "breaks" I take and well, other "projects" I take on (that I don't need to) and...you get the picture. I have more than enough time in every day to spend in my Lord's Word.

Well, almost exactly a month later, I must admit, I've not been as diligent as I had hoped. However, I continue to press on, praying and asking God to help me better manage my time and especially my rebellious attitude toward daily Bible reading. I know it may sound a bit strange to hear a women's Bible teacher say she struggles to read the Bible daily, but I do.

"Blessed is the man [person] who walks not in the counsel of the wicked, nor stands in the way of sinners, nor sits in the seat of scoffers; but his delight is in the law [instruction] of the LORD, and on his law he meditates day and night."

~Psalm 1:1-2 (ESV)

As much as I love the Word of God, I have at times, given into my sinful flesh and do not feed off of God's Word as I ought. I know I should, and I always love it when I do (because who doesn't feel better after a good meal...especially from the Lord's table)? But I find myself with the same battle the Apostle Paul writes of in Romans 7:18-24. And like the Apostle, though wrangling with this flesh, I rejoice saying, "Thanks be to God through Jesus Christ our Lord!" who alone has freed me and given me victory over the desires of this wretched flesh.

"For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but one who in every respect has been tempted as we are, yet without sin. Let us then with confidence draw near to the throne of grace, that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need."

~Hebrews 4:15-16 (ESV)

So in my time of need, as I am tempted to do something else besides feed from my Lord Jesus, the Word of God, I thank God for His Holy Spirit who reminds me that I can confidently pray, knowing I will receive help and be able stand up from under this temptation (1 Cor 10:13).

With this hope, I press on without guilt of  missed chapters or a missed day, but also without glibly thanking God for help, then misapply His grace as an excuse to continue sinning. Instead, the more grace God gives, the more I desire to be obedient to His Word and gather my daily Manna; He so lovingly provided me from Heaven. After all, what other response is there for such glorious grace? That is, if we truly understand God's grace.

God's mercies are new every morning (Lam 3:22-23). And I don't want to miss it because I wasn't disciplined enough the night before to go to bed when I should have; so I could wake up when I needed to; in order to give God the first fruits of my day like He gave me His First Fruit—His One and Only begotten Son.

If any of you are feeling like a marginal Christian like I often do, please read the short biography of A.W. Pink that I've included below. After reading about this giant of a Christian and where he struggled to be obedient to the Lord, I felt like there just might be some hope for me after all. I pray it'll be a source of encouragement for you as well.

Arthur Walkington Pink was born in 1886 in Nottingham, England. Though A.W. Pink was raised in a Christian home, he participated in a pre-New Age religious group of theosophicals until his early 20s. Nonetheless, his father faithfully taught him the Scriptures, and at age 22, A.W. Pink repented of his idolatry and put his full trust in Jesus Christ alone.

Desiring to better understand the Bible, he left England and came to the United States in the early 1900s to attend Moody Bible Institute. He left the institute six weeks later. Pink eventually pastored churches in four different states and also served in Australia for two to three years. In 1934 he returned to England after making the decision to serve the Lord through a writing ministry rather than a pastorate.

A.W. Pink was a deeply intellectual recluse, and could never find a church in which he felt he could both pastor and fellowship. Besides his dear wife Vera (whom he married in 1916), Pink didn't associate well with others. Though an outstanding theologian and exhorter of the Christian faith, he, like the rest of us, had sin issues, and lack of faithful fellowship with other Christians was one of them.

Pink and his wife moved to Scotland in 1940 where he continued his reclusive life and writing ministry until his death in 1952. And like his life, his death was quiet, with only a few aware of his Home going.

"Day by day, dear Lord, of Thee three things I pray: to see Thee more clearly, to love Thee more dearly, to follow Thee more nearly." (Richard of Chichester, 1197-1253)

"Sunny, why is it wrong for women to assert authority over men and is a woman sinning if she speaks at a women's conference and men show up?"

Desiring to be a good steward of the short time my Lord has appointed me on this earth, it seemed wiser to respond to the vast amount of emails and comments I've received by writing one article rather than trying to answer my readers individually on this particular topic. My prayer is that everyone who's already written as well as those who haven't but are wondering, might together, be encouraged by this article and the resources I'm happy to share.

Before I answer the above question, I want to clearly state that I am a complimentarian (theological view that men and women are equal in value before the sight of God and man, with differing roles within the home and church) and not an egalitarian (theological view that men and women have equal roles, i.e., ordain female pastors, elders, etc.).

"Let a woman learn quietly with all submissiveness. I do not permit a woman to teach or to exercise authority over a man; rather, she is to remain quiet. For Adam was formed first, then Eve; and Adam was not deceived, but the woman was deceived and became a transgressor."

~1 Timothy 2:11-14 (ESV)

God is a God of peace and order, not of chaos and confusion (1 Cor 14:33, 40). God has established every rule and authority that is in Heaven and on earth.

All that God created is good and beautiful, and though we live in a fallen world filled with sin, as God's beloved children, we are given a glorious gift in Christ: the ability to live as God wills and not as the depraved and our sinful flesh wills.

God established peaceful and orderly rule for the:

We see from the above Scripture references that the LORD established an order of authority even within Himself, the Godhead: Father, Son and the Holy Spirit. Though God is one God, revealed in three Persons and have the exact same nature, they have different roles. The Father commands and sends the Son, the Son obeys the Father and sends the Holy Spirit, and the Holy Spirit indwells believers, testifying to God—who is truth.

Therefore, if God has peace and order within Himself, why would He create anything without peace and order?

In 1 Timothy 2:11-14, I find it intriguing that God took the submission of women to male leadership all the way back to Genesis when Adam didn't lead Eve and allowed her to usurp his authority (and therefore, God's authority); bringing sin into the world. The woman, not the man, was recorded by God, as the first sinner. I find this intriguing because of the severity in which God compares a woman's refusal to submit under male authority within the church and her home, to the very first act of sin. Seeing the danger in usurping male leadership as God views it, every Christian woman should tremble as I do.

By God's wise and good design, He first created a man, but incomplete without a counterpart (so that he may not take pride thinking he is sufficient in himself). Then after the man Adam realized he was alone and was in need of a help-meet, the LORD created Eve from the man's rib so that she might always be by his side (like the rib, both delicate and strong; protecting man's heart and breath), doing him good and not harm all the days of her life (Prov 31:11-12).

Therefore, for a woman to speak at a woman's conference where men happen to show up is not a sin. For how can a woman be at fault before God or man for what man chooses to do from his own conscience? But if a woman accepts a speaking engagement before a mixed gender audience where she will be teaching from the Word of God, then by God's command and established order, she is in sin, for she is practicing authority over men.

Some people have argued, "But what if the men of the church give women permission to teach men and women?" To them I say, who is man, any man that he should have the audacity to disobey God's Word and reestablish peace and order according to himself? We must remember Paul's epistle to Timothy was written to a man, commanding men not to give authority to women over men. Therefore, any man who presumptuously gives women authority to teach men, is in sin. And any woman who obeys a man who allows them to sin (by teaching men) also sins...but she doesn't have to. Here, a woman is given the freedom in Christ to appropriate her God-given wisdom to say "No" to any man who tempts her to usurp God's ordained order for the church and her home.

"but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God's sight is very precious...as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord. And you are her children, if you do good and do not fear anything that is frightening."

~1 Peter 3:4, 6 (ESV)

When women choose to assert authority over men, they miss out on the beautiful protection from God and the lovely gift they can offer their husbands (or other male authority). Biblical submission is truly a gift from the Almighty for His precious creation—women. Let us not disdain it, but let us receive this gift from our Lord; desiring to be called daughters of Sarah who live by faith to please God, rather than live as daughters of Eve who first sinned against God.

Additional resources on biblical womanhood:

My Second Love: Biblical Submission and The Proverbs 31 Woman
Order In Creation - Ligonier Ministries Devotional
An Excellent Wife - Sermon by John MacArthur
The Role of Women in the Church, Part 1 - Sermon by Alistair Begg
The Role of Women in the Church, Part 2 - Sermon by Alistair Begg