abandoned to Christ.

Our family's first introduction to Dr. R.C. Sproul was in 2008 when my darling husband Jim and I were blessed to participate in a book/DVD study The Holiness of God. Our hearts were gripped by Sproul's teaching of the magnitude of God's holiness. Though we always knew that God is holy, we had, sadly, like many Christians in our time, marginalized this glorious attribute of our mighty Lord and God. Rather than see all of God's attributes (righteousness, love, grace, mercy) through the lens of His holiness, we saw His holiness as merely an addendum. But when we sat under Dr. Sproul's loving, courageous, and soundly doctrinal teaching on God's holiness, we knew we could never return to the mediocre standard of Christianity that's acceptable by many, if not most, Christians today.

After our initial introduction to R.C. Sproul's teaching through The Holiness of God, we began listening to RefNet in 2012, and have commended it to others as well as making access to it here on my blog. In 2013 we subscribed to Tabletalk Magazine, I enrolled in Ligonier Connect, and read the best book on marriage, The Intimate Marriage. In 2014 I won tickets to my very first (and hopefully not last) Ligonier Ministries conference in which our oldest son Michael was able to attend with me. There are countless other books, sermons, and resources that I could list in which God used Dr. Sproul and his ministry to help me to remember my true state without Christ (an enemy of a holy God), and my true state in Christ (beloved only because I am clothed in the righteousness of Christ). But to list them all, is to take on a nearly impossible task.

Because of the abandonment to Christ of one faith-filled man, my family continues to grow in our walk with the Lord, and have been burdened to exhort others to die to self daily, that the life of Christ may be more clearly manifested in us. God used one humble, brilliant, and ordinary man to reach, teach, and exhort millions to magnify the name of the LORD God Almighty and to worship Him in holiness and humility—just as He is due. My heart both mourns and rejoices in his Home-going. It's strange how someone I've never known personally, has impacted my life so immensely.

Dr. R.C. Sproul is the Martin Luther, Lewis Bayly, and Jonathan Edwards of our day, and the grave has no power to bury his indelible teaching. For nothing offered to Christ, no work done in His name and by the power of His Spirit, can ever be forgotten or erased.

Dr. Sproul ran a hard, diligent, and faithful race. He left this life with his "boots on". May we all strive to do the same.

Please for his family, friends, and ministry partners. I can't imagine what they are going through.

"But I do not account my life of any value nor as precious to myself, if only I may finish my course and the ministry that I received from the Lord Jesus, to testify to the gospel of the grace of God." (Acts 20:24)

Twenty-eight years ago, the Lord moved me to Southern California as an answer to my cry for help.

My faithful and merciful Father God had graciously and mercifully endured, preserved, and persevered me through 13 years of severe and brutal persecution. But because I did not heed His exhortation and admonition in Deuteronomy 8:11-20, I forgot that it was by His mighty hand that I received relief from my enemies. Much like the Israelites whom the LORD kindly saved and freed from the bondage of Egypt, I fancied that this reprieve was due to something good I had done—and for three years, I entertained the fallacy, that I deserved every good I received from the Lord. I behaved as if God owed me for my obedience, rather than remember that even my obedience was a gift from Him, through Jesus Christ; who through His death and resurrection, freed and enabled me to do what I could never do on my own—please and honor the one and only, holy and righteous God (Heb 11:6).

During these three years of insanity, the way I dressed, revealed what my heart believed about myself and the world around me.

My external sensuality revealed my internal depravity.

Though both men and women are attracted and addicted to pornography, this sexual sin is more prevalent with the male population. Which is why it isn't very loving, kind, nor thoughtful of us women to purposefully and carelessly tempt men (and even more so, our brothers in Christ) to sin by dressing, taking pictures of (and sharing it on social media), and carrying ourselves in sexually provocative ways. Flirting through our words, how we dress, walk, sit, etc. simply for an ego boost is exceedingly selfish, unloving—sinful. Like all other vices (gaming, gambling, smoking cigarettes, drinking alcohol, or engaging in drug abuse) pornography spirals into uncontrollable, life-destroying addiction. All vices deceive people into believing that they can escape from the painful and often lonely reality in which they currently find themselves.

It is our sinful pride that deceives us into believing that we, in ourselves, have the will and power to control our lives, the people around us, and whatever circumstance we encounter. In our arrogance, like Satan, we presume ourselves to be our own gods, and masters of our own destinies. Which is why we choose vices so we can feel as if we are in control of something in our lives. But it never works out that way. Rather, we only prove that even what we falsely perceived we had control over, is exactly what controls us. And we find ourselves, once again, at the mercy of something or someone, that dominates and destroys our well-being.

"Then David said to Gad, 'I am in great distress. Let me fall into the hand of the LORD, for his mercy is very great, but do not let me fall into the hand of man.' "

~1 Chronicles 21:13, ESV

Thanks be to God that His mercy is very great, and His compassion is complete in Christ the Lord. When we repent and trust everything in our lives to Jesus: our souls, our minds, and our hearts, we finally find the peace we all yearn for—peace within our very being (Mt 11:28-30). And in our humble declaration of love and devotion to Christ for all that He has accomplished for us through His necessary condescension, suffering, death, and resurrection; we first desire, then learn, to dress ourselves for His glory and pleasure alone. No longer do we seek to receive accolades and amass attention to exalt self, but we seek to give honor, glory, and praise to God for the magnificent riches He’s given to us in His only begotten Son.

In our seeking, we do what God commands, and emulate the faith of wise and chaste older women who can teach us how to love God, our husbands, our children, our friends, and all people in holiness, rather than for our happiness (Titus 2:3-5). And yes, according to God, we need to be taught all these things, because in our natural state, we only know how to love the desires of our wicked flesh.

As we hunger and thirst for righteousness (Mt 6:33) we begin to understand that modesty is first formed in the secret places of our heart, before it is adorned externally for all to see. For we know that we must first clean the inside of our cups before the outside can be truly clean (Mt 23:25-26).

"[L]ikewise also that women should adorn themselves in respectable apparel, with modesty and self-control, not with braided hair and gold or pearls or costly attire, but with what is proper for women who profess godliness—with good works."

~1 Timothy 2:9-10, ESV

Make no mistake, all things with God are always about the heart of the matter rather than merely the external acts themselves. Therefore, please do not misunderstand this passage to mean that women who braid their hair or wear jewelry are being immodest, or wrongly take pride in yourself because you don't. What this passage denotes as modesty is, that a humble and contrite heart toward God will display itself outwardly in “respectable apparel” for the time, place, and culture a Christian woman lives in. Though what is respectable in one era and one culture may vary, there are some standards of external modesty that transcend all—keeping private parts private: no skin tight, flashing clothing; no showing of cleavage, midriff, or wearing shorts or skirts that are so short, they reveal parts of our derrière while standing or sitting. Sadly, I see many professing Christian women attempting to usurp these clear biblical precepts of modesty by wearing the latest and popular peek-a-boo style of clothing, short-shorts, dresses, and skirts that don’t necessarily reveal any cleavage, midriff, or parts of their derrière, yet these “fashions” allude to, and draw a man’s eyes and sexual impulses to areas of a woman’s body, rather than draw men’s hearts to Christ the Lord.

Precious sisters in the Lord Jesus, like most (if not all) women, the clothes we daily choose to adorn ourselves with, reveals what we're feeling inside: happy, sad, lazy, or desiring attention because we need an ego boost. Therefore, I exhort you, let us first dress our hearts with strength and dignity, so that how we dress our bodies is a testimony of our holy fear, adoration, and trust in our first and greatest love—Christ Jesus, the King of kings and the Lord of lords. Let the way that we dress turn hearts and eyes toward Jesus and not toward ourselves (Ps 115:1-3).

If you’re reading this today and your heart is pierced, remember that repentance is another freeing and peaceful gift from our Father. Every day, God’s mercies are new. Every day, we choose what we desire to display: the light of the knowledge of the glory of God in the face of Jesus Christ, or the dark and depraved fashions of this world (2 Cor 4:5-6, Joshua 24:15).

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