Death is Not Dying: A Faith That Saves

Dearest brothers and sisters in the Lord Jesus,

I know I very rarely write personal notes, but I felt today, it was a good thing to do.

It's been quite some time since I've written anything. And those of you who have been with me for a while have probably already figured out health has once again taken a decline.

Due to my severe vitamin B12 and D deficiencies and the inability for my body to absorb and maintain normal values of both, my doctors have decided it was wise to check my blood at least every three months. Of course, I've never quite made it three months without having my blood checked, but it is a something to look forward to.

Back in December I was referred to yet another specialist - a pancreatic specialist, as it has become apparent my pancreas is not functioning well. Currently the pancreatic function test that is available is a very bad one and most often only detects a malady when 80% of the pancreas' function is no longer stable. So, the pancreatic specialist the Lord had my GI doc refer me to is one who has invented a new pancreatic function test that will detect malfunctions of the pancreas much sooner, providing a person with a greater percentage to recover their health. This test has already been approved by the FDA, but there's still much paperwork with insurance companies, etc they are waiting on. As soon as the test is available, they will call and perform this test on me. I found this out in February of this year.

During my visit with my newest doctor (my pancreatic specialist), he noted that what may be malfunctioning in my blood and other organs may be at a molecular level that cannot be tested, therefore, cannot be helped. He also determined that something may be going awry with liver as well and that I should get that checked out.

Both my family doctor and GI doctor checked my liver enzymes and sure enough, one of my liver enzymes were elevated. This led to an abdominal sonogram. This sonogram showed that although I consume absolutely no alcohol, am thin, eat healthy and exercise - I have what's called a fatty liver. But that wasn't all. This sonogram also showed some calcification (not stones) in my kidneys; which led my GI doctor to refer me to a Cardiologist. I was also told that I needed to have a liver biopsy to ensure there isn't any further damage or disease to my liver, which also over produces cholesterol, and liberally releases 100's of micrograms of Vitamin B12 every week (1,000 micrograms of B12 is enough to sustain a person for a year; this amount only last me about 3 weeks at best).

After the news about my kidneys, I wept and worshiped for two days. I did not think I should call the Cardiologist's office yet because I knew I was not in a proper state of spirit or mind to do so. I needed to be with my Maker. I needed to remember who God Is, according to who He says He Is and not according to how I feel or what my circumstances may claim. My God, the only true God is unchanging, although the circumstances of my life may be; and faster than I can seems.

I listened to the song entitled, "I'm Still Yours" by Kutless (the music video is on my right sidebar) over and over again. And I am resolved that no matter what, I will always lift my heart, my voice, my hands and my every breath to God my Father with praise and adoration for who He Is.

I finally called the Cardiologist after two days and was seen the same day. My EKG was abnormal and my Cardiologist was very concerned about both the abnormal EKG and my extremely high cholesterol (254) and LDL (184). He said that people with LDL at this level (who are like me) only have LDL this high due to heredity; and what I do personally only affects 15% of my LDL, which as you can see, isn't much and doesn't do anything to bring my numbers down. After our initial visit, and reviewing my labs and other test results my GI doctor sent over, he said it was a very good thing my GI doc sent me to him since it was apparent that my heart was also now a concern for me as well as all my other  health issues.

I have already had a Stress Echo performed (which came out good) prior to my liver biopsy and am due to have a Echocardiogram performed next Tuesday, May 4th. My cardiologist has me on a low dose of Crestor (to make sure my liver can handle it) and CoQ10 to keep those levels normal since Crestor is a statin and depletes the body of this necessary enzyme. I will have my blood tested again at the end of June to see how the Crestor has affected my liver and if is helping lower my cholesterol and LDL so no further damage will come to my kidneys or vascular system. I will also have my blood tested again in July by another one of my doctors to check the status of my other health issues.

I just got this update the other day. My liver biopsy results came back already! Thank You Jesus! And it showed that I only have fatty liver and there is no further damage to my liver at this time! Hallelujah! God is merciful!

So, what does a young 41 year old woman, who is the wife of one amazingly godly and loving husband; mother of two blessed and lovely teenage sons say about all this? She says, "Blessed be the name of the LORD! Thanks be to the God who gives and takes away! May the name of the LORD always be exalted and praised from the hearts and not just the lips, of all His people!"

For those of you who might think I have the attitude I have because I'm either in shock, living in a fantasy land, not dealing well with reality, or just plain lying and glossing over this because I'm a Christian, I'd like to share this little story with you to help you understand that my words are true. And my heart I am sharing with you now, is not lying to you, or to me. I am speaking the truth.

When I was only 5 years old, I remember a remarkable woman at church who asked all us kids to pray for her husband who had just been diagnosed with cancer. Many weeks went by and no "happy" news of his recovery came. Then one day, this precious woman of God, with tears, peace and  joy (which I had never seen all at once and didn't quite understand) said to all of us, "Well children. I want to thank you all for your prayers. God has heard and it seems He has chosen to heal my husband by taking him Home. It will only be a matter of time. But remember this, if you prayed for my husband's healing, thinking he will not die, then you were mistaken. God's healing doesn't always happen here. So don't you be mad at God. Don't you ever be angry with God because God is God and  you are not. God is always right, He is always good and He always makes the perfect decisions....even if it hurts and we don't understand it. Remember children, you have no right to ever be angry with God."

I sat there with the other kids, weeping for her loss and her obvious pain. But we all marveled at the brilliance of joy and peace in the midst of her heartache and tears. And I prayed, "Lord, I don't know what this is. But please Lord, I see it is good. Give me faith like this." And so He did. Therefore, how can I not praise the name of the Great God who has done such wonderful things to me?

To witness this truth in another faithful woman of God, watch the video below:

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